Playing Fair

It's dollars to doughnuts at our state fair
It's the best state fair in the state!

~ Rodgers and Hammerstein

State fairs.

You gotta love ‘em.

I mean, where else can you see food in all its forms in such close proximity?

Why, just yesterday I saw a couple of chicken wings on a plate, and another pair on a chicken – of all places!

Yes, it’s the week of our WORLD FAMOUS Northwest Washington Fair where every year I volunteer to spend six days cooking corndogs for a good cause.

Obviously, the “good cause” is NOT the American Heart Association.

Anyway, this year it looks like the nation’s state fair competition is hotter than a deep fat fryer in the middle of August.

Rumor has it that Iowa has unveiled its latest weapon in the fight – the double bacon-wrapped, bacon-battered corndog.

Showoffs.

And THEN –

They got a visit from the President.

Coincidence?

I think not.

This is just so unfair.

Iowa already boasts the world’s largest revolving jail, truck stop, and popcorn ball – and now they have the first corndog to come with a coupon for free use of the fair’s defibrillator.

Sheesh.

Mr. President, if you are reading this (and if you’re cool, I’m sure you are), I think you should come to OUR fair. We have espresso, crazy Dutch poffertjes (don’t worry, I can’t pronounce it either), and…

You know you want some.

Yeah, it’s a corndog eat corndog world out here, Mr. President.

PROMPT: Dredge up some of your old fair memories and deep fat fry ‘em into a whopper of a tale. Or get creative in the kitchen the Iowa way – bacon-wrapped Twinkies, bacon-wrapped ice cream, bacon-wrapped…