It just so happens
that my little rural county ranks 4th in the nation’s per
capita coffee consumption. Apparently we’re just behind Seattle, San Francisco,
and some place in Alaska where they probably use only drip…
an IV drip.
Those Alaskans will
stop at nothing to get on the percolated podium.
Anyway, I’m pretty
sure that our recent spike in coffee drinking was thanks to
Luckily, I'm in good company.
When J.S. Bach wasn't working on Fugues and Passions, he was suckin’ down the home brew. Next
thing you know, he’s expressing his espresso devotion with a Coffee Cantata
(seriously – look it up). Composer Verdi was next to chime in. “Coffee is balm
to the heart and spirit,” he said (quite musically, I’m sure).
And Verdi could
have added “the mind” as well. Java research has found that it can boost mental
And while coffee’s
effects on creativity specifically are mixed, the latest studies have found
that combining a caffeine buzz with coffee shop background noise is great for
the mind’s elbow.
And speaking of
One group of
researchers has suggested that drinking over 5 cups of coffee a day can
increase your chances of auditory hallucinations…
Hmmm… Those voices
you’re hearing may not be those of your book’s characters after all.
Anyway, so far my
“ode to Joe” sounds a lot like the Lennon classic, Whatever Gets You
Thru the Night.
Because in my book…
Whatever gets you
through the day
PROMPT: Go ahead and
slip yourself “a slug from the wonderful mug” by writing your own Java Jive
today. But if you’re not feeling musical, no problem! Ponder your main
character’s favorite coffee house order. Or go for a Best Beverage ABC
featuring D for Double Shot and T for Tall No
Foam No Fat Caramel Machiato.
Given that the Seattle
City Council now wants to ban the words “citizen” and “brown bag” (I am as
serious as a heart attack here)… I thought this one was worth a re-post.
the great state of Washington made headlines when it went on a little tear to
make all state laws gender-neutral.
the words freshman, fisherman, and penmanship have been banned.
Now we can
only be first-year students and fishers engaged in handwriting here in the Evergreen State.
somebody’s feelings might get hurt if we use those other words.
here’s my take —
called a “freshman” is going to turn you into a non-functioning human curled up
in a fetal position and crying for your mama —
how many of those “sensitive” freshmen out there are at this very moment merrily
singing along to every rap song featuring words that sound like garden tools or
rhyme with “itches?”
regarding the word updates, one National Women’s Law Center senior adviser said,
“This is important in changing hearts and minds.”
pretty sure penmanship is making a BIG impact on hearts and minds.
So where do
we stop, Ms. Adviser?
I mean, I’m
not sure what to call myself right now.
can’t be a woMAN…
or a feMALE.
or a perSON.
Or a huMAN being.
Should we ban those words, too?
just go with XX from now on.
about those letters, Washington State?
I’ve been thinking…
looks a little too male for my taste.
I think it
should go, don’t you?
And Y —
only guys have Y chromosomes, so…
know what should be outta here —
get out of the word business.
when we finally ban ALL of the words and letters that can potentially offend a
hu*** per*** (believe me, I’ve worked as a therapist — there is NO END to the list of things folks can get
worked up over or break down about),
Take a good
long look at what remains…
all writers —
If you are
going to put pen to page, you are going to offend someone.
“The writer who is a
real writer is a rebel who never stops.”
I thought we should spend today celebrating noes. Noes,
noes, wonderful noes! There are so many different kinds of noes in the world,
don’t you think?
First there are the noes associated with
rejection. We've covered them here previously, and in my opinion, those
are the noes you can largely ignore.
Then there are the noes allied with independence. If
you’re a parent you know exactly what I am talking about. I remember
a morning when my dear, sweet, charming, and docile 18-month-old boy awoke,
stood up in his crib and shouted “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” at the very top of
his lungs. And so it began… the terrible twos a few months early (that kid has
always been an over-achiever).
Of course, there are those parental noes, too. The ones
related to any danger that could befall your once sweet, charming, and docile
18-month-old boy. My husband and I had to say no so many times
regarding the electrical outlets that our children took to calling them
“no-noes.” In fact, they referred to outlets as “no-noes” for so many years
that we once fretted they would head off to college and say, “Excuse me, could
you please direct me to the nearest no-no? I need to charge my
There are also those “positive” noes associated with
advertising. As in – NO FAT! NO CHOLESTEROL! NO SUGAR! NO FLAVOR! Sorry, that
last one was mine and would be an unlikely find in advertising.
And what would we do without the “NOOOOOOoooooooooooo!”
linked to Luke learning that Darth was really his father?
PROMPT: Tackle those noes today! The
noes that mean no. The noes that mean maybe. The noes that mean What
the H...? What does no mean to you? What image or
story does no evoke? Create. Create. Create!