Curses

It was Etiquette Week last week, and DANG we missed it!

But HECK, I didn't miss this —

New data reveals that those of us here in the great state of Washington curse much less often than the rest of you.

I know what you’re thinking—

The same thing I was…

Like, What The FUDGE!?

You see, it is not that we curse less. SHELL no.

Here in the Evergreen state we've simply perfected the pseudo-swear.

So don’t get our dander up.

Because if you choose to use those REALLY bad words —

like freshMANor penMANship —

Trust me, we will not hesitate to call you a SON OF A PEACH MOTHERTRUCKER right to your face.

And the state that’s chock-full of potty-mouthed pirates majoring in expletives?

Ohio

Oh. My. Oh.

No wonder they call themselves the BUCKeyes.

PROMPT: If your character needs to say something, but can’t because “there are preschool toys present,” then you need to learn the fine art of pseudo-swearing. Make a list of colorful ways for him or her to let it all hang out. Need some inspiration? Pick up The Craptastic Guide to Pseudo-Swearing by Michelle Witte.

Holy sheet rock, this is gonna be fun!